The Prognosticator Episode 26

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THE_PROGNOSTICATOR_EPISODE26
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****** DEADLY ABORTION ******
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Cnn: What did she say
.
Me: she’s currently busy now, she promise
to call when she’s less busy
.
Tola: Thank you sir, but do you promise
nothing bad will happen to me
.
Me: Yes 101% assurance, even she (nurse
Titi) said it in her conversation with me
.
Cnn: I trust the nurse
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Me: Yeah she’s professional in this work
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Tola: Alright sir, i want it done as soon as
possible my daddy would kill me if he
finds out
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Me: Sure he’ll get mad at you, even your
mum will also be disappointe in you
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Tola: Yes uncle pesman, she always warned
me not to give birth out of wedlock
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Cnn: Thanks for helping me pesman, am very
grateful
.
Me: Stop this Bro, you don’t know how
saccharin you’re to me
.
Tola served us breakfast of egg and bread
with hot tea, immediately I finished the food
my phone beeped , it was sms from nurse
Titi, she sent me “Please call me I love you” I
called her back asap
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Me: Hi nurse (put my phone on loud
speaker)
.
Nurse Titi: Hi pesman, I’m now free can we
talk
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Me: Yes have been expecting your call for a
while
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Nurse Titi: Am on now
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Me: Ok, how do we go about what I asked
earlier
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Nurse Titi: The abortion?
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Me: Yes
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Nurse Titi: How do you want it?
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Me: Quickly
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Nurse Titi: Do you want it to be done here in
hospital or in your house
.
Me: Can you explain it better so I can choose
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Nurse Titi: If you want it done in hospital,
you have one form to fill, you’ll need one
guarantor that can stand for you, the person
must be your relatives in case something
bad happened, your wife’s parents would
also sign, before the doctor can do anything
on her, and you’ll pay the sum of seventeen
thousand naira 17,000naira
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Me: Ok what of home service?
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Nurse Titi: I will be in charge of home
service, you’ll pay me just 4k (four thousand
naira ) without any form to fill or guarantor
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Cnn: Let go for home service
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Me: I will go for home service
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Nurse Titi: Send the address ,I will be there
by 4:30pm just be expecting me and tell her
not to eat any solid foods
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Me: Thanks so much bye
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Nurse Titi: Bye ***hang up***
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Hmmmm the terms and conditions of this
doctor is too much, one guarantor, parents
must sign, and with the sum of 17,000naira,
haha is too much, because of abortion, just
mere abortion that if you dilute
“Bicarbonate soda” with lemon fruit or
seven up together, the pregnancy will flush
out instantly
.
Tola: Pesman i don’t think I will go for
abortion again
.
Me: Why
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Tola: Don’t you think the doctors term is too
high?
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Cnn: Too high
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Me: Yes brother, its too high
.
Cnn: I think we should go for home service
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Me: I think so
.
Tola: Don’t you think house service can
backfire?
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Cnn: so your father is ready to stand as
guarantor
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Tola: My dad must not hear of this
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Me: Let’s go for home service then, she’ll be
here by 4:30, don’t be scared nothing bad
will happen to you
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Tola: I pray so
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After we finalized the issue of abortion we
agreed to go for home service,.
Cnn and I went for my jamb registration, i
registered successfully the school I choose
are “University of Abuja”
“Ahmadu Bello university Zaria (ABU)”
“Fedpoly Offa”
“Kaduna state polytechnic Kaduna”
“Osun state college of education ilesha”
“Osun state college of education ila”.
On our way back home cnn and i engaged
in chat
.
Me: I pray I pass this jamb o, because there
is nothing in this head o ***Scratching my
head***
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Cnn: When did you leave secondary school,
that makes you forget everything?
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Me: 2009 na moi-moi
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Cnn: You’ll pass by God’s grace
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Me: Have already passed, Dupe promise me
that ***silence, pesman you be mumu o, do
you wants to tell him who dupe is? ***
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Cnn: Dupe promise you what?
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Me: She said she’d be teaching me at home
every evening (I lied)
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Cnn: You ain’t even ashamed of yourself
woman for that matter
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Me: Not concerned you, it’s my cross lemme
carry it alone
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Cnn: na you sabi o
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Me: That reminds me I called madam hadiza
yesterday, I told her what you said i should
tell her she was happy, even she said she’ll
take me out for lunch today, in a very big
restaurant am now a celebrity
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Cnn: What time?
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Me: I think around 4pm
.
Cnn: Why 4pm
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Me: What happened to 4pm?
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Cnn: Have you forget of the nurse you called
.
Me: ***Remembered*** Oh! What should i
do now
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Cnn: please cross out the outing with her
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Me: But my presence isn’t needed by the
time of abortion
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Cnn: If you’re not there Tola will not agree to
do it, please you have to do this for me, call
madam hadiza and tell her you’re at where
you want to register jamb and people are
much there so you’ll fix tomorrow with her
.
Me: ***sad face***
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Cnn: please pesman am begging you
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Me: No problem I will call her but I’ll not tell
her am unable to register jamb, because she
might know people that she can easily call to
register it for me
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Cnn: What are you going to tell her now?
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Me: I’ll come up with something reasonable
that this
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Cnn: Thank you
.
“I called madam hadiza asap, she picked on
first ring”
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Madam hadiza: Hi love
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Me: Good morning, how was your night?
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Madam hadiza: Fine and yours
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Me: I slept like a toy
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Madam hadiza: Laughed, thanks for
wonderful replied you gave me yesterday,
guess you don’t forget our deal?
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Me: Which of deal, we have a lots of deals
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Madam hadiza: The lunch
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Me: That’s why I call
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Madam hadiza: To remind me I guess
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Me: Nope
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Madam hadiza: pesman don’t tell me you
want to cancel the outing
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Me: Not intentionally, even am not happy
with it
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Madam hadiza: ***With disappointed
voice*** What happened
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Me: Erm Erm ***stammer*** actually my
mother wants to send me on errands by
4pm and I don’t know when am returning
home
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Madam hadiza: What of having breakfast
with me? This morning
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Me: Am on my way to jamb registration
Centre, let the outing be tomorrow please i
beg of you
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Madam hadiza: it pain me o pesman
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Me: Likewise me, and am so sorry
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Madam hadiza: No whala tomorrow by what
time
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Me: Same time
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Madam hadiza: 4pm
.
Me: Yes
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Madam hadiza: Do I have your word?
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Me: Yes you do
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Madam hadiza: Ok no problem, have a
wonderful day ahead
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Me: You too bye
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Madam hadiza: Bye ***Hang up***
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Cnn: Thanks for this pesman, i know it’s not
easy to sacrifice your time for me
.
Me: You deserve more than this Bro, you
have also sacrificed your time for me when I
needed it most ***My phone rang that
moment it brought out conversation to
desist and forbear***
I looked at the screen the caller was no
other person but the Queen of Zaria
“Jameelah” I picked
.
Me: Hi queen of Zaria
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Jameelah: Oh! Romantic pesman, I love the
pet name you given to me, so romantic i love
it
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Me: Queen of Zaria
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Jameelah: Yes I love it
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Me: That’s wonderful
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Jameelah: How was your night?
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Me: Fine and yours
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Jameelah: Sleepless
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Me: Why?
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Jameelah: I think of you through the night,
till day break, sleep eluded me
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Me: Sorry dear
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Jameelah: when are we seeing?
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Me: Thought we have a deal
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Jameelah: Evening right?
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Me: Yeah, just be expecting my call, but i
don’t think we can meet in My house again
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Jameelah: Why?
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Me: My brother arrived from Lagos today
and he’s with me in my house
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Jameelah: so let pick a venue then
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Me: Ok pick
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Jameelah: What of Prince “O” hotel?
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Me: it Ok by me
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Jameelah: Time
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Me: 5:30pm
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Jameelah: Deal or no deal?
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Me: Deal
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Jameelah: Thank Pes bye
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Me: Bye ***hang up***
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“I think going on date with Jameelah by
5:30pm would be ok, once I had cancelled
the previous date with madam hadiza, I pray
nurse Titi act fast when dealing with Tola”
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Cnn: Who is princess of Zaria or what you
called her
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Me: Queen of Zaria
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Cnn: Yes who is she?
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Me: Jameelah
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Cnn: Who is Jameelah again?
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Me: You don’t know anything, “Fayemi
charm is working pesman is smiling”
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Cnn: Tell me more about her
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Me: I met her at Grace birthday party, she
collected my number and we have been
talking since then
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Cnn: Pesman be careful with girls
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Me: Have you forgotten your words?
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Cnn: Which of my words?
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Me: seven girlfriends at a time
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Cnn: I just said, I don’t mean it
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Me: But I want it to happen, am having five
(5) now reaming two more
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Cnn: ***Surprised*** five? Who and who?
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Me: Dupe (Thought she’s not part of
charmed babies I met her and madam
hadiza b4 I went for the charm) madam
hadiza, Christabel, Jameelah and nurse Titi
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Cnn: ***surprised*** Pesman who is nurse
Titi?
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Me: The nurse I called for Tola’s abortion, I
met her yesterday when we visited Abbey in
the hospital
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Cnn: Stop lying Christabel is with us
yesterday so when did you meet her that
Christabel and I Don’t know?
.
Me: Two of you don’t know, she wrote her
number on pieces of paper and gave it to
me
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Cnn: ***hailing me*** Pesman pesman
Babalawo himself
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Me: ***Smiling***
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Cnn: So nurse Titi is now part of your game
.
Me: Partially, because I haven’t asked her
out, I will finish it today when she comes for
Tola’s abortion
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Cnn: And she’s demanding 4k from her
father in-law for abortion
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Me: Its her profession not yours let her do
what she know how to do best
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Cnn: So abortion is what she knew how to
do best
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Me: I don’t talk too much
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Cnn: Ok oo
————————————-
When we reached CNN house, I sent address
to nurse Titi (The abortion matron)
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******Fast Forward******
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At exactly 4:52pm nurse Titi show up in cnn
room she was putting on her white
uniform, she was looking charming and
beautiful.
Her smile was killing when she revealed her
gap tooth, I feel in love with her instantata,
even cnn admiring her, she walked in and
hugged me like her boyfriend phased
because of my supernatural cream.
She gave Tola two (2) injections and warned
her not to go out and not to stay far from
toilet because the injections will take effect
on her soon, cnn also gave her the
requested money of 4k.
I saw her off without knowing we have
written invitation latter to trouble and our
invitation has been accepted.
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Hmmmm pesman
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To be continued

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