Femi
It was a busy day at the oshodi isale market cum garage, Oshodi is one one the busiest and most popular market and garage in Lagos, South west Nigeria. The traders were selling their wares while the noises of ‘conductors’ calling their different destinations filled the air,
Femi was eating his roasted plantain popularly called Boli with groundnut under the bridge at the garage close to a lady selling different kinds of gins and alcoholic drinks popularly called ‘paraga’. The sounds of Iyana Oworo New Garage, Ibadan Iwo Road, and different destinations made conversing a difficult job to do at the garage, Femi was trying to get the attention of the ‘Paraga’ seller popularly called ‘Sikira Omo Ile Eleru’ meaning Sikira the lady with many assets, Femi had developed a kind of interest and feelings towards Sikira in the past few weeks but even after buying numerous drinks for almost everyone in the garage which was a strain to his pocket, just to get her notice his philanthropic nature, she seems not to be interested in all is advances.
Femi is a good looking but badly maintained garage boy, actually born with a fair complexion, but there is something about garage life that makes even Micheal
Jackson return to his natural colour but with the terrible effect that comes with bleaching. Femi is actually competing with coal for the darkest creation. However, he has a lovely set of white teeth that act like the only visible sign when he is in the dark.
Like most boys in the garage, Femi is a Chelsea fan, due to the name of his favorite dry gin. The old blue fly emirate jersey remains a constant, it seems he has a lot of it. Boys in the garage usually mock him calling him ‘alaso kan’ the man with a uniform.
Sikira on the other hand was the contrast of Femi with a terrible bleached skin turning brown and several types of local tattoos all over her body. From scorpion to her names to ‘arabambi’ written all over. She will pass for a very good impression for an advert on bleaching gone bad.
The day was going smoothly and Femi was gaining ground on is wooing of Skira when all of a sudden he heard a loud bang Poookkkkaaa,
Pooookkkkaaa, and the whole garage was thrown into confusion. Before he could say jack robinson the whole noisy garage had become a graveyard, there is this magic about Lagos, one has to wonder where everyone disappeared to when you hear a gunshot on a very traffic locked road which will become as free as a bird with the first sound of a gun shot or the movement of about fifty boys on the same road.
Wondering where everyone had disappeared to, he stood up and moved out of the shed, just as he stepped out he was met with a resounding punch on his face gbbooosssaaa, gboosssaaa, he staggers a little, while losing the remaining boli with him. Just as he was about gaining his balance, a big bang occurred again, this time the bang was quiet heavy in Femi’s head but no one around seem to hear it, Femi was dazed as the bottle of coca cola landed on his head, not knowing where he was all he could hear was someone saying ‘ this guy get odeshi ooo, the bottle no gree bust for hin head’ just as Femi landed on the floor with a swollen , broken head and bleeding gum, all he could see was blood flowing, then came another one but this time the sound was Splaaasssshhh and the sound was not as heavy as the former. Femi could hear the sounds of broken bottles falling to the ground, he tried to stop the blood gushing out from every direction of his head like a man with a crown of thrones, with his palm but he couldn’t and then he passed out.